McLovin

I went to the DMV today and turned in my expired NJ drivers license to get a MASS license. They confiscated my old license and now I have to wait 2 weeks to get my new one....wtf.....went to Bukowski's to meet up with Cora, only to be rejected at the bar for no ID....only in a ding dong college town.

Good thing SLA hooked me up with a fake Hawaii ID. Now I only need to teach her how to rotate images in photoshop!

B.O.O.T.A.Y.

this is genius

b.o.o.t.a.y. you ain't got no alibi

d.a.n.c.e.

this is a fun video........

I like Wolfkin

It's a little eerie, creepy, sleazy, and fun....spooky danish people

http://www.wolfkin.dk/

Brand
New
Pants

CCTV

Chinese weirdness + Dutch architects = CCTV in Beijing

White women and cheeseburgers

Two things Singapore does not have.....
well, their white women are australians and their burgers suck...its just not the same....I might never go back...whopeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Officer Byrd

What's the word from officer byrd...........its so much more disco than I remember

local celebrities

we broke in the karaoke machine Friday night...big fun. We heard the best version of "sweet child o mine" and the worst version of lots of other songs. And no one spilled anything on my rug, which is a plus. I'm gonna expand the music library for next time. So far the only requests are for Jackson 5 and Brittney Spears. whopee..

My friend scored free VIP seat tickets to the Dropkick Murphys last night, which means we didn't have to be in the mosh pit. It was in Lowell, wicked. Right before they came on people started chanting Yankees suck. The inferiority complex runs deep, even when the Red Sox are a better team, not to mention at a concert in the off season.....There were little 8yr old girls dancing in these crazy Irish getups, an Irish boxer named Mickey something something, the Lowell high school choir, and violin kids from the Berklee. They really know how to rile up the locals. Too bad I couldn't understand a word. I think I'm out of the loop on these guys, and I can live with that.

K A R A O K E

Yesterday I was asking if anyone knew a karaoke place cheaper than Do-Re-Mi....Today I bought a karaoke machine online. I'm turning my apartment into a karaoke bar and all I need is a good name. The working name is : Mr Happy's Super Happy Good Fun Number 1 time.



Wocka Wocka

when your beef beefs

I got my first Peapod delivery this morning. Its awesome and cheaper than going to Shaws....I was going to make a beef stew with some beef I had in the freezer (since December). Thawed it this week. Opened it up and I'm pretty sure it let out a big fart cuz it didn't smell right. Apparently this is not a good thing. It might be time to cut back on the meat.

De-Stitched

I got my stitches out this morning. The nurse was impressed with the Japanese stitch work. I wasn't so impressed with her. While there were still a bunch of stitches left, she said, well that's it. I am not THAT hairy to confuse thick black stitches with hair.

So anyway, do chicks dig guys with scars?

Eat more cake

Half a cake in a single person's apartment with no real food = bad news. Come get some.

Corn Nuts

My corn nut experiment didn't go so well last night. I bought some corn kernels and soaked them overnight to make for my belated bday party yesterday. It ended up as a smoky mess of burnt popcorn in a pot of oil.

So I did some more research and found that corn nuts are made from a specific type of giganto corn kernels and that I was using kernels especially made for popcorn. Blekh. Where the crap am I going to get Peruvian Cusco Corn Kernels..........

I got in a fight with the Yakuza

I noticed that since I got back to Boston that girls are checking out my bandaged up fist. It only occurred to me now that maybe people think I got into some vicious fight. Yup, I got into a brawl with the Yakuza in Shinjuku. The guy in the middle tried to smack me with his dong sack, which was actually full of 100 yen coins. I karate chopped it down and split open my knuckles.

naruhodo

Eat More Sushi or We Kill You

No idea what this was about....people on the street refused to talk about it...........

What's this guy saying...uuuuuuh

Singapore going nuts in Chinese New Year preparation....uuuuuuh

Tokyo Drift

Another trip to Singapore, a much better united flight. Since we managed to stay at the greatest hotel in the world- Shangri La Singapore, our concierge harassed United till they changed our flights, allowing us to have a few nights in Tokyo on the way back.

We crashed at the hotel Thursday night, went off to Shibuya.....Kiddie wonderland, place of many pachinko games, burger joints, love hotels, and mega crosswalks. Friday we hit up Ginza and ate at a super expensive sushi bar full of uptown wives lunching before they spent up their husbands cash....bought a lot of pens...took photos of cool buildings...found the biggest Muji shop ever and bought more pens. Bars there are super tiny. Most could hardly fit a dozen people. We went into one where they were making fun of us for a couple minutes. I got my whiskey with a giant clear ball of ice. Gorgeous.

Taxis are all lined with lace, drivers all wear suits, and their prices are way expensive. It cost us 40 usd to go across town one night. 7 bucks just when you get inside. This is why at 2am if you go into a McDonalds you'll find people from all walks of life asleep since they missed their trains.

During a beer stop at a convenience store I had to stop and get an action figure, Gundam Virtual. He is awesome. Kung fu grip even. Saturday night was our second karaoke night in a row....all you can drink. By 1am my fist went mysteriously through some glasses and started spurting blood everywhere. The record shows I kept singing...till we went to the hospital. Luckily we had a translator since you can't get by in Japan without knowing the language. After a massively painful needle, I fell asleep and woke up with a bandaged, stiched up hand. I was then transported to a friend's hotel room where I crashed.

Sunday harajuku girl day was a letdown since they were all at some convention nearby. I looked to replace my blood stained jeans only to find that in Tokyo the largest jeans size is a 32, and everything is super expensive.

We toured Omotesando which is next to where the harajuku girls hang out....Omotesando has all the cool new designer shops, Tods by Toyo Ito was very sexy...my favorite.....

Our last night we stayed at a capsule hotel in Shinjuku. The floor guide to the hotel let us know that there was a shemale bar right below us. Shemale porn reigned supreme in the pod. Everyone gets kicked out by 10am, and you bathe together sitting in front of a mirror. I don't know if that's the way people in Japan normally shower, sitting down. Its not half bad.

Then I found five dollars.....which reminds me, Japan has the sexiest looking money ever.

Aphex Twin is a Musical Genius

I forgot all about this video.....it starts off awesome and gets better...

magic

I will teach you how to count to ten with one hand without resetting. Magic. It will double your ability to count. Count to twenty without resetting when you use both hands. You might want to put on a helmet...so it don't make a mess when I blowyamiiiiind.

But later....don't feel like it now.

the past week in a nutshell

Got an emergency haircut on Sunday. I had a dream that I didn't complain that she cut it too short. It came true. Best haircut ever. Taught the bartender at the middle east about scotch and green tea. He made a tasty mix.

Left for Hong Kong on Monday. Spent 15 hours on a United 747 with no TV and bitter bitchy flight attendants as old as the plane. The most rude and condescending group of people you can find. Don't fly United. I saw a flight attendant refuse to give a woman a band aid because she didn't want to bother filling out a report for opening the first aid kit. The only nice one on the plane snuck her one. She also snuck me some booze. Still, don't fly United.

Drank a lot on said plane. Scotch is about the only thing to get by on in such situations.

Spent a night at the Venetian Macau. Woke up at 2:30 (just like today), went down to the casino a few hours later and won 300HKD at a slot machine. I'm rich. A few hours of touring and meetings before we had to get on another United flight to Singapore. More scotch please. Don't fly United.

We stayed at a resort spa in Sentosa Island. It was very relaxing. In the morning I woke up to peacocks calling. At breakfast we watched a monkey steal a woman's chocolate croissant.

Two days of meetings, with no yelling or blaming (wow!) and almost no chinese food (awesome!). Our midnight flight out on Friday night was delayed. Went to a lounge that had individual jacuzzis. I was in there for an hour, right up to boarding time. The lounge was near the Emirates gate. It was one machine gun carrying guard for every five white robed passenger. They have no seats there, they lay out picnic blankets.

Qantas has the best in flight entertainment ever. On demand, movies, cd's, tv... I watched the Darjeeling Limited, Superbad, Interview, and a documentary about a movie called Emmanuel, and for that hour and a half my screen was pretty much filled with nudity. Cheeky Australians. Cathay Pacific eat your heart out. The food was good too. Marc Newson designed the cutlery and everything. Nice.

A couple hours in London, stretching out at another lounge. Drank tea. Looked at planes. Mocked United.

A short hop from London to Boston on BA. Got here around 1pm. A total of 50-something hours of travel. I fell asleep at 6 and woke up at 230 this morning. It's cold here. My apt has no room service.